no room left for ME

OMG! Shoot me now!
2 days and 50 people through my door…
5 sleepover guests…
barking dog, demanding kids, attention craving friends,
This house was…is bursting at the seams.

You might not understand this, actually, I am not sure I understand this…
but I am angry.

No more guests, no more noise, no more giant meals to make…
just 5 loads of laundry waiting,
tables and chairs to be put away,
dishes to be cleaned,
groceries to be purchased,
floors to be swept,
and work tomorrow.

Yeah, tonight sounds like a really good night for intimacy?

NOW he is asking if he can help.
He complained about his sore knee as I opened tables and brought up folding chairs.
He sat at the table with the masses as I served.
He abandoned his mean crabby mother and left me to look after her.
He had drinks with his friends as I set the table.
He napped as I fought sleep while listening to lengthy never ending stories.
He prayed and got honors as I babysat bitching relatives.

I set myself up for this,
I knew it was coming!
I smiled through it all.
I said it was nothing.

and now I am angry.
and he doesn’t get it…
and I can’t explain it.

what do I do with the expanding emotions pushing at my skin from the inside
making feel like I’m going to explode if I don’t find the release valve.

don’t touch me
don’t talk to me
certainly don’t try to reason with me

maybe I can disappear into sleep

I vaguely remember that tomorrow will be a new day and I will be refreshed.

1. 7am tomorrow-go running…ahhh 🙂


~ by Barbi Migi on September 21, 2009.

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